oregonsurf.com

Golf is such a dirty sport, what with the balls, and sticks, and the holes. I'm suprised anybody plays it without a raincoat.

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Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly , can leave early today."

Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question.."

Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."

Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."

Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.

Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."

Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."

Johnny is even madder than before.

Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."

Teacher: "That's right Nancy, you may also leave."

Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer any of the questions.

When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"

The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"


Johnny: " TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW ?"

Can you blame the guy? dude needs to take advantage of his celebrity and bang mass chicks. Pelt hunt the shitt out of the scene.

SlimVest wrote:Can you blame the guy? Pelt hunt the shitt out of the scene.

Word. Why do think his dad named him Tiger? King of the Jungle.

How could everyone not see this coming?

Tiger=Big Cat
Big Cat=Jungle P*ssy
Jungle P*ssy=Massive Bush...as in massive amounts of bush.

The newest saying..... "You can't see the Woods for the bushes..."

My 88 year old grandpa at Christmas dinner when talking about the Tiger Woods sex scandals, out of nowhere he says.... "They call me Wood"....man that got a good laugh out of everyone!

SlimVest wrote:Can you blame the guy? dude needs to take advantage of his celebrity and bang mass chicks. Pelt hunt the shitt out of the scene.

move over Wilt?

Tiger does well, I'm sure, but at 15, this kid has got quite a few years jump start on Tiger:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Justin_Bieber

What I don't understand is that after all this he says, "I'm talking an indefinite break from golf."

Seems to me like this is the EXACT best time to be spending lots of hours away from home on the golf course.

Lil' Snowy Plover wrote:What I don't understand is that after all this he says, "I'm talking an indefinite break from golf."

Seems to me like this is the EXACT best time to be spending lots of hours away from home on the golf course.

Pretty sure he's alone at home now.