Breaking News: NO POORS ALLOWED!
Piggybacking on the precedent set by Cannon Beach and Manzanita closures, the yuppies of PC have leveled up a notch and taken it upon themselves to "close" the beach to that pitiful caste who cannot afford shoreline property. Needless to say, townies who once foolishly considered themselves locals, are up in arms about how the beach belongs to everyone [except inland goons].
The whole thing is beyond stupid. Somebody call my lawyer.
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